No one (I know) takes time to look at the stars anymore. They’re all wrapped up in their own digital fabricated universes. Don’t they realize what’s in front of them is far greater than what is beyond them? I suppose I’m just a cynic. I’m no better than them. I wasted the last half hour watching stupid videos on YouTube. I wonder if this is all just some sort of experiment trying their hardest to brainwash us all? It’s all well and good for the things it does, but it consumes whole-heartedly. Relationships and friendships with those next to you fray. While (sometimes) those far away grow stronger. I guess it is all up to perspective and preference. I’m just that nerd who loves having the latest and greatest and realize, those with technologies just as good as mine are far more interested than I. I want something to work, the way it is supposed to, the first time. I care about the small moments I invest in the digital treasure troves. They want it to fill a void in their hearts.
The earth isn’t doing too hot, any estimation as to when it will perish? I always wonder that as I walk the streets or drive in my (not as fuel efficient as I’d like) car. Cigarette butts and McDonald’s wrappers scattered on the streets. Crumbling buildings remain in ruin. Recycle recycle plastered all around; as they wrap their products in plastic. I guess I’m just weird. I look at things a different way I suppose. I can’t really pinpoint it. I feel like something is constantly wrong with the world but no one else seems to notice. I can’t believe the misery thats permantaed our souls. Is consumption no longer the answer? Well I won’t ever know, I see people going off grid and buying their tiny homes, when they just spend the same on a normal home. Their is a price to pay for everything and everyone seems to be willing.
I’m not all bad though. I see the positives in everything, as much as I can. I see you holding the door open for that person. Tossing your spare change into the charity jar. Trying their hardest to bury their darkness because, they would want no one to feel the way they do. I know there are so many good people in the world, and so many bad. I look at them each as same as I can as everyone has a motive. I know everything happens for a reason but I always want to know why?
I’m not a great person, I’ve got plenty of flaws. I see the world through darkness. Not to mention without cause. I don’t know why we do all that we do. We say its for them, but really; it should be for you. I want to always be someone else? I can’t really fathom. What’s so wrong with me? What’s really the matter? I fabricate transgressions in the deep recesses of my mind. I wonder whats not working, am I really not kind. I always want answers, right away if possible. But sometimes I know, I shouldn’t even bother. Some things in the world has no pleasing answer. Some things in the world really can’t be mastered.
I know I’m rumbling and ranting, and I think I even rhymed? Sometimes the memory overrules the mind. It makes up situations that are not all together great. I’m just like you, I’ve got plenty of deadweight. Knowledge is the solution to problems that need not one. I want an answer, someting with value for everyone. This is silly I know I’m really quite a fool. I guess I’ll say goodnight.
Good luck to you too.